I had a dream…a book half empty
I had a dream, a few days ago…I was in Fairfax, bars and restaurants were open, people hanging outside, just a sweet summer day filled with the buzz of a vibrant small Cali town. In my dream I suddenly realized, I was thirsty, and as the minutes went by I became more and more alert of a sense of deep dehydration…I felt hot, uncomfortable, so I naturally took my clothes off, as a child would do in front of a summer stream, or to taste the wind on its skin, so it could breathe again…but the feeling got worse, I stood up, panicked, looking for help, looking for water… despite my nudity, nobody seemed to have noticed me…I looked around, to seek for it, and as I stood up, my vision started to blur. I was losing sight! Very slowly, and unsure of where I was placing my steps, I crossed the plaza, hands out. I saw a stone bench through my struggling eyes and went to sit on its steps. I realized, but too late, that I had sat on somebody. It was a young man, pretty and beautiful, laying in the sun, arms stretched above him. He stared at me with surprise. Startled, I rapidly stood up and looked for a blanket or towel to cover my body. I wrapped myself up, to hide my nudity, in shame, and went off to another side of the town. I finally found water, to my greatest relief, and drank big gulps to satiate my thirst. Suddenly a young woman appeared, she was angry, and the intensity of her emotion appeared through her eyes as a cold heart. She picked up a stone from the dusty ground and threw it at me. Other members of the scene started doing the same. I protected myself with my arms and curled up in a corner to avoid the pain. Suddenly, a change of scene. I am sitting in front of an old book. It is laying in front of me, with its yellow musky pages, open right in the middle. On one side, the book is filled with words, a story is written. On the other side of the old relic, the pages, white and virgin, stand in silence with no words to be seen. A voice then comes to be, and says: "can you feel it in your heart? Humanity is walking with only one leg. The half of the story is not written and not yet realized". I ask "what is the other part"? The voice explains as I feel a deep sense of warmth in my heart "it is the feminine part of the world that has been lost", therefor humanity is only walking on one leg". I then imagine a person or an animal walking with only one leg, it naturally turns in circles, on itself. I wake up. What was this dream about??? During the day I contemplated and felt the feminine in me, the quiet, vulnerable nudity and vulnerability of its presence. The unseen, the silent, the soft, the one that does not fight back, adapts to all obstacles of life, and forgives. I thought of her, in me. It was not the woman I was feeling, but really the feminine power, the one that stands and allows things to unfold and that lives into every human being. I called that part in me, as I called the story, for humanity. The one where the thirsty and the blind are seen, nourished, cared for. The one where women do not stand against each other, competing with each other for men and resources, but the one that stands strong in the face of adversity. I call the feminine to serve the masculine and the masculine to serve the feminine, so the book can finally be completed. When coming back from Europe a few weeks ago, I felt the heat of the fires, I felt the buzz of survival and stress that inhabits this country. I felt the need to protect myself from the stones. I felt the thirst. It occurred to me that it was my choice to nurture the feminine in me. To take the time to rest, to trust the future despite the chaos, to embrace the pain and the tears in myself and others, and to be strong and stay hydrated, in every way you can imagine. I took time to breathe, observe nature and do nothing...nothing but listen and love unconditionally. Dreams are strange, aren't they?